Yesterday, one of the kids at my internship ran into a wall and split is head open and it was the scariest thing but it was also amazing. As soon as I saw him hit the wall, I knew it was serious. It was loud, he is small, and he was running very fast. He started crying and I immediately noticed blood. This was the crazy part for me… I didn’t feel scared or nervous or anything like that; I immediately felt responsible. Not for his injury, but for making him feel safe. It wasn’t a conscious decision, it was just impulsive. Put on a brave face. Console him. Pick him up. If you get blood on you, don’t freak out because he will freak out. Check his motor skills. Make him feel comfortable. Get him cleaned up. Alert his parents. Find the first aid kit. Clean the wound. Cool him off. Encourage calm breathing. It was crazy how I snapped into “adult mode” from playing Pokemon on my iPhone and watching the kids play tag. But the most intense realization was how difficult it is being a parent. I almost cried, honestly because I was so worried about him. Not then and there, but when I got home a couple hours later it hit me. He was a total trooper and made the whole thing easier for the other staff member and I but still… I don’t know. I’m rambling. Anyways… maybe not any time soon, but I can’t wait to be a father figure. Maybe not a biological dad. Maybe not a legal guardian. But I wan’t to be a father figure to someone. Someone who makes a child feel loved and cared for and worried about and inspired by and all that stuff. I feel like I’m headed in that direction and despite how much of a pain in the butt the kids are… I am really starting to love each child like they’re my own. I worry about them all the time and truly want them to have happy and fulfilled lives. I love being a social worker.